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No war can be without a hero, and PNAC's script featured a wonderful account of brave Jessica Lynch, the diehard POW that went down shooting behind enemy lines.

Rumsfeld, Wolfowitz Score Big Crowds And Obstruct View With Brilliantly Scripted Marionette Show

"Our brave Jessie faces evil, says a prayer for God and America, and then ... STAB! ... Jessie single-handedly defeats the evil dragon with a fatal blow to the neck!," reads Deputy Secretary of Defense Paul Wolfowitz from a once-shelved script from their 'Project for a New American Century' screenplay, which would still be collecting dust had it not been for "another Pearl Harbor". While Wolfowitz dictates the plot to the cheers and applause of the sheeple, Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld leverages his day job skills to work both sides of the fable ... read on ...

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