2003 ARCHIVE
|
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12/31/03
|
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Two Thousand
Three Flashbaq |
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12/14/03
|
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44 Million Demand
Free Healthcare |
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12/7/03
|
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Matt Drudge Discovers
Wonders Of File-Sharing - Kazaa An Inside Source |
|
12/5/03
|
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Hannity and
Kitty Debuts on FOX News |
|
11/26/03
|
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Flight Attendants
For Ted Airlines Already Dreading Passengers Named Ted |
|
11/24/03
|
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Rage Against The
Voting Machine |
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11/16/03
|
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Rumsfeld, Wolfowitz
Score Big Crowds And Obstruct View With Brilliantly Scripted
Marionette Show |
|
11/8/03
|
 |
Sales of HP's
New Printer/Shredder Expected to Remain Brisk |
|
11/4/03
|
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Misguided Right-wing
Extremist Bombs Contortion Clinic |
|
11/1/03
|
 |
The Suspense Writers
At Reuters |
|
10/28/03
|
 |
Area Horse Eats
Vacuum |
|
10/21/03
|
 |
Lawrence, Corporate
Watchdog, Dies at 17 |
|
10/17/03
|
 |
Thermostat In
Hell Seems To Be OK After All |
|
10/13/03
|
 |
Curmudgeon's
Corner 2 |
|
10/9/03
|
 |
Californians
Insist They Have The Right To Be As Ridiculous As They Want |
|
10/3/03
|
 |
Gropers Everywhere
Embarrassed By Arnold Schwarzenegger |
|
9/26/03
|
 |
Saddam - Al Qaeda
Connection Uncovered! |
|
9/22/03
|
 |
Bush Declares
$1 Now Worth $2; Boosts Economy by 100% |
|
9/17/03
|
 |
Medical Device Makers
In Ethical Dilemma Over Continuing To Prolong Dick Cheney's
Life |
|
9/10/03
|
 |
Burning Man Takes
Broadway! |
|
9/4/03
|
 |
Priest
Mistakingly Drinks Bounty Collected From Church Blood Drive
|
|
8/27/03
|
 |
Ctrl, Alt, Delete
to Merge |
|
8/21/03
|
 |
Freddy Vs.
Jason: 5/5 Stars |
|
8/19/03
|
 |
Blackout Brings
Record Numbers To Latest Flash Mob Event |
|
8/16/03
|
 |
Curmudgeon's
Corner |
|
8/13/03
|
 |
Natural Formation
In Area Birch Tree Identified As Squirrel |
|
8/8/03
|
 |
Torn, Hanging, And
Dimpled Chads Found On Kobe Bryant Accuser |
|
8/6/03
|
 |
Area Dork Launches
Pre-Emptive Strike During Mild Session of Twister |
|
8/3/03
|
 |
NASA Report:
"While US Remains Fixated on Global Domination, Several
Planets and Moons Within Own Solar System Await Claimants
of Bountiful Water, Gas Resources" |
|
7/30/03
|
 |
Residents
of Kansas and Nebraska to Switch |
|
7/25/03
|
 |
Warren
Buffett Offers Up $100 Million In Whistleblowing Prize Money |
|
7/19/03
|
 |
Conspiracy
Collector Expands Into Entire Row At Local Self-Storage Facility |
|
7/12/03
|
 |
Sock From
Bush's Combat Suit Gets Placement Next to Lewinsky's Dress
at Smithsonian |
|
7/4/03
|
 |
Man
Celebrates 1,000th Straight Day at Nearby 24-Hour Starbucks |
|
7/1/03
|
 |
Elephants
Organize Protest Outside Republican Party Headquarters |
|
6/28/03
|
 |
Tommy
Franks Smashes Antiques Roadshow Record |
|
6/25/03
|
 |
Ann
Coulter Touts Conservatism, McCarthy Era: Retires To Kitchen |
|
6/21/03
|
 |
Drummer's
Excessive Use of China Cymbal Irks Condo Association |
|
6/17/03
|
 |
Bush
Misheard When Telling Graduates to "Jump Off a Bridge" |
|
6/13/03
|
 |
Iraqi
Housewives Find Joy, Convenience In Western No-Spill Cartons |
|
6/10/03
|
 |
Looting
Follows Local High School's Win At Track Meet Finals |
|
6/3/03
|
 |
Representing
Their Five Media Owners, Toons Grow, Extend, Fifth Finger |
|
6/2/03
|
 |
Headline
Is "A Gem" Says Local News Station Manager |
|
5/43/03
|
 |
Editors
of Satirical Website Concerned: Staff Writers' Latest Submission
May Be Falsified |
|
5/27/03
|
 |
Nations
Meet To Decide Action In Congo Crisis |
|
5/24/03
|
 |
Local
Linens 'n Things "Out of Things" |
|
5/20/03
|
 |
California
Democrats Carpool is Less About The Roadtripping And More
About The Safety |
|
5/16/03
|
 |
New Hampshire:
Video Tape Found in Basra is "Smoking Gun" |
|
5/12/03
|
 |
Anti-American
Association of America To Convene for Annual Conference |
|
5/5/03
|
 |
"Free
Airfare To Cuba" Reads Title of Surprise New Government
Program |
|
4/25/03
|
 |
Pentagon
Proudly Displays Outstanding Cribbage Hand |
|
4/23/03
|
 |
“No
Cuts” Bill Becomes Law |
|
4/18/03
|
 |
South of
the Border Liberated |
|
4/13/03
|
 |
Lego
"Rebuild Iraq" Set Said To Carry Heavy Price And
Responsibility |
|
4/10/03
|
 |
IROC Liberated |
|
4/9/03
|
 |
Biopsy Results
Confirm Ari Fleischer Full of Shit |
|
4/7/03
|
 |
On the
Coattails of MOAB Success, Army Introduces 100 Ton "Father
Of All Destruction" Bomb |
|
4/4/03
|
 |
Following
Invasion, America's 2004 Olympic Hopefuls Cease Training |
|
4/2/03
|
 |
Halle
Berry, Tim Burton Wed in Private Weekend Ceremony |
|
3/30/03
|
 |
Tour
Group Plans Iraqi Vacation in 2004 |
|
3/15/03
|
 |
Transatlantic
Food Fight Escalates |
|
3/13/03
|
 |
Give
Me an Oxygenated Break |
|
3/12/03
|
 |
Man
Purchases Mini-Cam With No Intention Of Filming Wife Blowing
Him |
|
3/11/03
|
 |
Parody
Of Parody Unacceptable, Says Parody Website |
|
3/10/03
|
 |
Catholic
Church Furious Over Introduction of Carb-Free Eucharist by
Famed Dietitian |
|
3/7/03
|
 |
Analysts:
Mattel's Merging of Boys and Girls Business Units May Have
Undesired Consequences |
|
3/4/03
|
 |
Phish
Back On Tour: Human Shields Leave Iraq |
|
2/27/03
|
 |
Bush
Follows-Up On Environmental Plans For Military |
|
2/26/03
|
 |
Accounting
Irregularities Force Local Man to Revise Penis Size |
|
2/24/03
|
 |
MILF Takes
Top Honor at Annual Acronym Awards |
|
2/21/03
|
 |
Groundbreaking
Ceremony Held For "Music Pirating Detention, Reconditioning,
and Packaging Center" Met With Strong Industry Support,
Alarms Most Moral Humans |
|
2/14/03
|
 |
Americans
Told To Buckle Up |
|
2/11/03
|
 |
Research
and Development Department At Pizza Hut Grapples With Increasing
Demands From Marketing In Finding New Places To Stuff Cheese
|
|
2/7/03
|
 |
Al
Qaida Sleeper Cell Uncovered in Sunnyvale |
|
2/4/03
|
 |
Journalism
Schools To Replace Curriculum Entirely |
|
1/28/03
|
 |
Teenager
Watched Dharma & Greg After Brutal Murders |
|
1/26/03
|
 |
Services
Held For Predator Drone |
|
1/17/03
|
 |
UN Inspectors
Find Eleven Mickey Mantle Rookie Cards in "Mint"
Condition |
|
1/11/03
|
 |
Canada,
United States Agree to Construct Wall Along Border |
|
1/8/03
|
 |
Chicken
Soup For The Soul Authors Tapped Out |
|
1/4/03
|
 |
An Interview
with Jim Goad |
