First New Wave of Political Refugees Hit Australian Shores
Seek Political Asylum; Freedom; Acceptance

11/10/02 - (Darwin, AU) - A boat filled with American political refugees washed ashore early this morning in a sleepy fishing town in northern Australia, according to locals. The crew, led by Tom Daschle and Richard Gephardt, appeared badly broken and emaciated. Witnesses described the crew's clothing as "threadbare"and their morale as "nonexistent". The men could exert barely a muster and their bodies slumped into the Australian sand just as the boat, whose structural integrity was compromised by an unforgiving sea, buckled and sank.

The trip to safety, snapped by a shark in the Pacific Ocean
(the shark was employed by Humor Is Dead)

Local emergency personnel were appalled upon witnessing the condition of the refugees, and set about immediately to conduct medical tests and tend to the crew's dangerously gaping headwounds. The men were then tossed into an ambulance and moved indefinitely to an "undisclosed location" to be "treated" by authorities.

Australian officials, already concerned about political refugees from Indonesia, fear that waves of American political asylum seekers will become the norm here. Branded as Anti-American by the American Republic and soundly thrashed and neglected by political supporters, these political lepers represent the last of the ineffectual opposition to the one-party system now firmly in place in The Homeland. Republicrats fill 100% of the seats in congress, as well as the judicial and executive branches, and have for some time. The Green party, widely viewed as a band of malicious puppy butchers, have long since been “extinguished” despite their memorable "Silent Green…Is People!" campaign.