99.9999999% Unable to Make A Difference - Should Stop Trying
- Research shows that 99.9999999% of the world's population is
simply unable to make a difference, let alone change the world,
and should immediately stop trying. According to the researchers,
a detailed analysis of human history reveals a startling trend
of excess ineffectual and futile activity performed under false
pretenses and misguided inspiration.
The 6 people
in charge of the study, who also happen to be the .0000001% whose
actions actually do make a difference, now have a legitimate argument
that the rest of the population sit down, shut up, and bend over
without bitching and moaning about it. Furthermore, all charities
and senseless acts of goodwill should cease immediately, since
they are useless.
come just as Congress is pushing for a ban on random acts of kindness,
which have been cited as "a complete waste of time and energy."
Under the new "You Cannot Make A Difference" laws, all hippies
are subject to brutal beatings without due process, to be delivered
by anyone who damn well feels like it - something the populace
approves of unanimously. The Make A Difference Foundation
will officially change it's name to the You're Wasting Your